I’m Not in Love

I’m not in love with you,

Although I think of you often.

I’m not in love with you,

Even though I long to hear you.

I spend time daily in my mind

Dreaming and thinking of you.

It’s like I feel deep within my heart

That you might be the one for me.

But my cynical and pessimistic mind

Refuses to even consider a notion,

Or daydream a fantasy that you could

Truly and deeply adore and love me.

My mind and my heart will not mesh.

I refuse to budge and let my guard down,

For I know that cold and darkness lurks

Whenever you trust someone too much.

*sigh*

I’m not in love with you,

Although I think of you often.

I’m not in love with you,

Even though I long to hear you.

I think again about our connection

And the peaceful feelings that wrap

Around me after we meet or talk,

And I wonder will it ever be for me.

We care for and about each other,

I sense it and feel it in your touch,

You respect and you treat me well

We get along as friends and lovers.

My darling I wish I could tell you

How much I love you so much,

But my fear of heartache and pain

Will hold me back from speaking.

If you could visualize my thoughts

You’d see yourself next to many hearts

Even though our situations aren’t easy,

We’re still pushing on steady and strong.

I’m not in love with you,

Although I think of you often.

I’m not in love with you,

Even though I long to hear you.

–by Maria Mocha © 2006

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